Go away, negative energy!
When I was still working in Olongapo, I rented a room in one of the buildings in Magsaysay Avenue. The room had its own restroom and a wooden bed (with Uratex foam) that was good for two people. The jalousie window was my only concern because of limited privacy. I stayed on the second floor and the occupants of the next building could see my whole area if I would open the windows. Anyway, I put on some green plastic sheet on the jalousies for the purpose of blocking off some light.
It was not the perfect place because we were not allowed to cook but since I took out food either from the company canteen or from the fastfood, it was a non-issue. The water supply was good except for some repairs and maintenance once in a while that left us with no water for five hours.
In all my years of stay in that room from 2001 to 2006, I was always sick and emotionally-drained. There was this sort of negative energy all over my room but I just could not pinpoint what exactly it was. Ghost? No, I would feel one if there was one. Maybe I could even see one, but there was none. The list of illness went from bronchitis to edema to clinical depression and so on. There were times when I felt like I was afraid of something but I could not determine what and why.
Before the place was temporarily closed for renovation in January 2006, I got the chance to have a small talk with the flower shop assistant at the ground floor of the building. I asked her about the history of the building and who the original owners were. She told me that their flower shop used to be a bar at the height of the “American era” in Olongapo and the upper part of the building used to be an inn.
Back in my room, I recalled my first impression of the room and I remembered the great sadness that I felt when I entered the room five years ago. The room was full of negative energies of perhaps lust, greed, dishonesty and anger. The negative energies haunted the room for years and the occupants felt it one way or another.
I don’t need the negative emotional baggage of the past so I am trying to create happy and meaningful memories in my current place to replace all the negative energies that the previous occupants left on us. Prayer is a powerful tool to drive away any negative energies of the past. My children’s laughter replaced whatever tears (from the former occupants) fell on our current place. More than a physically clean house, we need a house that’s full of positive energy of love and optimism. We can do that by getting rid of heated arguments, gossips, feelings of hopelessness, jealousy and dishonesty.
from the web—tell me I’m just dreaming
Two nights ago, I dreamed about an old acquaintance of mine. In that dream, we were supposed to be lovers and he was asking me why I married somebody else. Old acquaintance, Mr. X, and I never became an item though there was a little attraction that happened between us. Before that little attraction could elevate into something more serious, somebody came along the way and I forgot anything about Mr. X. In fact, we became part of the project team years later and the relationship was purely professional; we were not even talking unless it was work-related. To dream about him 12 years later is weird considering the fact that I never regarded him as one of my “prospects” during my “pre-sell-by-date” years.
To dream about an old lover that I’m trying to erase from my life is even weirder. In that dream, I was back to being 17 years old but I was wearing 2013 clothes. I was wearing a white shirt and blue jeans and I was carrying some books when he happened to walk in front of me. He acknowledged my presence but he didn’t approach me or smiled at me. He was wearing all black and he was back to being 17 years old, too but he was sporting a 90’s style. On the contrary, I was wearing my current hairstyle and I was surprised to see him acting cold towards me.
The feeling was heavy and his appearance on my dream seemed so real. Do I still love him? I’m very sure that I have zero feelings for him. Is he in trouble? I don’t know. Nobody is telling me about him. What if he’s actually in trouble? What if (God forbid) he’s dying or he has died? Would I go to the funeral? Would his wife let me see him for the last time?
Drama drama. I just hope the all black attire does not mean anything negative.
Have you ever dreamed so real that you thought it was something very real? I had a dream last night about a person who I haven’t seen for half a decade now. In my dream, we were having a good conversation which was a rarity when we were still in touch with each other. He told me (in my dream) that he’s carrying an affair with a certain Jenny and I advised him to focus on his married life. He asked me if I want to have an affair with him and I said that I am happy with my family. Then I woke up, it was 5:30 AM.
The dream was so real and his presence seemed like the one that I felt half a decade ago. Good thing, our meeting was just a dream.
Cherry, a good friend of mine, came back from the States after a two-month stay there. We were supposed to go back to her tarot reader for our mid-year tarot reading. Last January, she referred me to her tarot reader for my 2008 life, love and money forecast. It was Cherry who was the promoter; I was just very curious about tarot stuffs.
Here are some of the things that the tarot reader read last January for me:
- PV and I will totally end our relationship because of a scandal that will shock me. I have yet to know the gravity of that supposed scandal. I’m honest to say that there are times when I feel that something very big and bad happened to PV that’s why he acted and reacted that way towards our relationship. I assess how I feel about why our relationship has to end and I realize that I don’t feel any bitterness towards him. It must be my great love for him again?
- I will get pregnant before the year ends. I almost laughed when the tarot reader said this. “Wala po akong ka-sex ngayon!” I said. But she insisted that it’s what she sees on the card. It’s something that I don’t want to happen: getting pregnant by someone that I don’t even love. Surely, I don’t practice casual sex but there are other ways in which a girl can get pregnant. What if someone forces me and gets me preggy? Morbid ka talaga, Iris! Wag naman sana! Good thing, I was able to save the link on door locks that Joel sent early this year.
- I will have the opportunity to travel abroad. What’s so impossible about that? Maybe a better interpretation of this reading would be: I will have the opportunity to travel abroad for official business purposes. Hay, sana nga!
- I will be promoted. Hahaha! Really? How can that happen when I’m just starting with my new function? Well, sana nga!
I asked Cherry when we’ll go back to the tarot reader. It seemed that she’s no longer interested in tarot readings! Himala!
“Ayoko na, Iris, bumalik dun. Nagbabasa na ako ng Purpose Driven Life, eh!” she said in between sips on her latte.